I Trust You
by Que'dBystander
Summary: Allison Mills may not be a Foster but she fits in perfectly. She was a lone spirit and always had been. She didn't get attached; just wasn't her thing, until Mariana Foster. The connection she felt was unexpected but she never questioned it nor looked back. This is a story about how love, loyalty, and friendship can change a person and get them through their worst.
1. Weary

Hey guys! This is my second fan fiction. I absolutely love The Fosters, so I couldn't resist. This story is about Allison Mills. ( She is of no relation to my other character Allison Harper. I just really like the name Allison.) She's introduced to the Fosters as Callie's best friend and well eventually Mariana's girlfriend. I had to write a fic about Mariana because I absolutely love her character and I don't think she gets enough scene time. Anyways enjoy. I know I enjoyed writing it. ( Shipping Alliana! )

Disclaimer: I do not own the Fosters.

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><p>Things had been great with Mariana. Sure we hadn't put a label on what we were but it was obvious we were growing into more then just friends who made out in bathrooms, supply closets, and their moms office. That's all any lesbian who had been in love with a straight girl could ask for right? Pulling up to the Adams Fosters residence, I spot Jesus and Brandon in the yard. They'd discarded the leaf blower and lawn mower to a game of pass.<p>

"You know if your mom comes out here and see this; she'd destroying that ball and will probably make you two voluntarily mow all your neighbors yard for the rest of the summer…..Free!"This seem to put a damper in their distraction momentarily.

Jesus Peers at the door a slow smirk forming. "Yea mom would definitely be upset we didn't include her in our game of pass."

"I'm talking about Lena." The smirk quickly disappeared from his face. Smiling at my small victory I shove Jesus playfully. "Where's Mariana?" I sit at the base of the steps toying with my shoelace. I'd called and text Mariana an hour ago and she hadn't responded. We'd made plans to go surfing earlier in the morning but I guess she'd overslept.

Picking up his shirt he'd so carelessly thrown to the curb earlier, Brandon motions for me to scoot over. "She's inside with Zac." My face dropped immediately. Brandon sensing his mistake shuffled nervously trying to ease his awkwardness. "With Callie, Jude, and Moms. Their in the kitchen making snacks. Zac starts tutoring Jude today."

Jesus smiles weakly knowing how I feel about the situation. Everyone did. I hadn't been around for Mari and Zac's world wind relationship; however I understood the terms of their break up and it wasn't because feelings were forgotten or lost. He'd moved. Moved! Not his feelings for Mariana, he himself left. So you could understand my reservations when he showed up three weeks ago claiming his return. And apparently Mariana. That whole fiasco was quickly diffused but I couldn't help but question their standing. Here I was pining over a girl who's best friend happen to be her ex boyfriend and first love. I swear I've had the best luck with chicks. I couldn't fight the feeling that his being here had something to do with why Mariana had stood me up this morning. Sighing in defeat I head for the door.

"Morning Fosters! I walk in the kitchen to Lena efficiently cutting up fruit and Stef leisurely propped by the window watching Jesus and Brandon. Jude and Zac are huddled in the corner going over what I assume is math and Callie is organizing the mound of photographs we developed yesterday at my job. Mariana has headphones in washing fruit in the sink. I cant help but notice Zac trying to casually sneak looks at her.

"Hey Sweets!" Stef places a kiss on my temple before discarding her now empty mug into the sink.

Lena smiles at me in acknowledgement as I walk over to Callie. In a matter of two months Callie and I had become inseparable; she was absolutely amazing and really understood me. It wasn't surprising when everyone assumed that we were together. In fact Callie often joked that if I ever magically turned into a guy I wouldn't be able to ward her off any longer. But she was my best friend and if I was being honest with myself only friend. That was later confirmed when Mariana and I got caught making out in her Mama's office a few weeks ago.

"Hey Ally!" I genuinely smiled as Jude's beaming grin gave way to how excited he was to see me. Zac looked away embarrassed or guilty. Not sure which one.

"Hey Cal these look horrible!" I place a small kiss on Callie's cheek to show I was joking. Playfully swatting me away she picks up one picture in particular and agrees.

"You think?" I forget I'm upset with Mariana for a few minutes noting the picture Callie captured obviously without us knowing. Mariana had been trying to fight off my attempt of feeding her bacon. She was wrapped in my arms tightly our megawatt grins matching.

"I'll be keeping this one." I glance over to Zac hoping he'd seen the picture. He bashfully diverted his gaze back to the math book. Sneaking up behind my still oblivious girlfriend I hold her firmly in place by her waist as my other hand removes one of her ear buds.

"Funny I had a beach date with this very hot Latina about two hours ago but she stood me up. Know anything about that?" Mariana flinched slightly, I don't know if it was because I scared her or the question.

"Hey!" She replies sheepishly. "When did you get here?" I eye her warily, something was going on. I glance over at Zac who's watching the exchange almost expectantly. Now wasn't the time so I decide its best to leave well enough alone; id corner Mariana later.

"Well I got here just in time to save your brothers from having to mow the entire neighborhood for the summer." I kiss her forehead and walk back over to Callie. Callie gives me a sympathetic look before avoiding my question gaze. She knows something up.

"Seriously! Its like they cant put down that ball for five minutes." Lena's annoyance with the situation was more then obvious.

Stef chuckled and winked at me. "Well thank you for straightening them out. As you can see your assumption was correct. But I think I'll go make sure their throwing…." Lena throws Stef a warning look. "I mean clipping the hedges properly." She try's to bee-line for the door only to be halted by Lena's stern glare. "Or not…." The nervous laughter that followed caused instant laughter from the kids.

I'm staring at the picture of Mariana and I. Handing over the now spotless fruit to Lena before standing beside me, Mari's exterior visibly softens when she sees it. "Oh my god Callie! You took this? Its incredible." Mariana leans further into my side and I physically exhale. "It really is a great picture Cal. We look…." "Happy!" Mari finishes my sentence. We did look great together, even though she was a good three inches shorter then me it worked. My strawberry blonde hair played lovely with her now dirty blonde look. And my awesome genes that allowed me to tan so graciously went well with Mariana's light mocha complexion. Paired with green eyes and a body most women would kill for; I was a hay-maker at its finest. But together with Mari we were definitely KO material.

Zac's abrupt scrapping of his chair got everyone's attention. "Umm sorry. Jude and I are done for today. I have to head into work but ill be back tomorrow. Same time?" His question was directed to Stef but his eyes shifted uneasily from me to Mariana. Lena choose to speak up first. "Great! Thank you so much Zac. We do appreciate you doing this. Taking time out of your summer plans." He visibly relaxed his attention now on an earnest Lena. "It's no problem really. There's no where else id rather be." Callie dug her nails into my arm trying to distract me from the obvious dig Zac directed towards me. Sensing my discomfort and Mari's lost for words Stef searches her purse. "Hey if you give me a minute to find my wallet I can pay you before you go." Packing up his bag Zac quickly responds. "No honestly there is no need. Besides I like the company and Jude here is keeping me sharp on my algebra until school starts up again. So really it's a win win." Zac's smile is genuine as he ruffles Jude's hair.

"Well don't work too hard and your always welcome. Maybe you'd like to stay for dinner tomorrow?" Lena had been completely ignoring the tension between Zac and I or really had no clue. I gawped at her, knowing it was Lena being Lena. However at the expense of my happiness. "Maybe….." He waved his final goodbyes lingering a bit longer to stare at Mari. Who nervously tried to act casual.

"Moms. Since I finished my work can I go help Brandon and Jesus?" Jude was the only kid I knew who got excited about manual labor. I smiled a little distracting myself from my gut feeling of dread that appeared moments prior. "Yes sweetie. I'll be out in a minute with snack and drinks." Jude ran for the door.

Turning slightly I peer over to Lena trying to casually express my concern. "So this whole tutoring thing with Jude…its all summer?" Stef's small smile indicated she knew of my worries. "I would assume so. Jude has improved so much since Zac has been helping him. At this rate he'll be ahead of his peers when school starts." Lena's voice oozed pride and joy. Stef rolled her eyes at how giddy her wife could get about education.

Deciding to tread water slowly without raising red flags; more so Mariana's. I lean over the island trying to capture Lena's undivided attention. "You know if id known Jude needed help I would've been more then happy to assist. He's a great kid and he always brightens my day. I wouldn't mind spending a few extra hours with him." Smiles rounded the room as everyone silently agreed with me. Jude was probably secretly everyone's favorite in the house.

"Yeah that would definitely work. With your two jobs, summer classes, internship, and voluntary work every other weekend at the rec center." I pinch Callie in return for closing my case be fore it even starts.

"I think Callie is right my love. You have taken on a lot." Stef's tone full of worry and concern. "College resumes don't build themselves and ill be graduating next year so there's not much time." The blush that followed shortly was short lived but evident. I didn't like it when Stef and Lena worried about me. I'd gotten emancipated when I was 15 and had taken care of myself efficiently years prior. I wasn't used to the constant concern and it made me very uncomfortable; even when Mariana did it.

"No! No! No! I barely see you as is. No more side projects. Your wearing yourself thin." Callie quickly chimed in grinning. "Besides when your not beckoning to Mariana's every call your mines. Got it!" I shrug my shoulders in defeat knowing that arguing against Mari and Callie was a losing battle. Suddenly remembering my morning plans, I turn directly in front of Mari, "Since my time is so precious what happened this morning? I called you and you never called me back." I watch Mariana alternate stances while looking at me quizzically before exhaling."Zac kissed me this morning." Silence erupted the room, all eyes on me.

"Oh." The dejection in my voice encourages Mari to continue. "I stopped it of course. I didn't want him to get the wrong impression. We talked afterwards but things are still a bit awkward." Bricks lifted from my shoulders as I captured Mari in a bone crushing hug briefly. Tucking a stray strand of hair that escaped from her messy bun I breathe a genuine "thank you".

The smile that followed eased my mind. "He's just trying to adjust to things. Eventually he'll get used to the idea of there being an us. I have and that's progress right?" Adoration spilled from my face. Just weeks ago Mariana and I were sneaking around in closets and classrooms because she couldn't admit how she felt. And now here she was openly expressing her feelings about us; in front of the people she loved most. That meant so much to me, I was so proud of her and glancing at Lena I could see she agreed.

My momentary distraction of Lena nicked a tiny voice to invade my subconscious. "Get used to things? What do you mean get used to things?" Mariana had been born with the ability to play on words and if you didn't catch on easily to undertones and context she'd easily out play you. Mari's eyes immediately gave her away, or at least with me they always did. "He's had three weeks to adjust." I cross my arms defensively over my chest and a perfectly sculpted eyebrow raises in question. "What exactly did he say to you?" By now I've forgotten about my audience and everyone's shifting uncomfortably not sure whether to stay or leave.

"He sees I'm happy and as my best friend he'll always support that no matter what." I would've left it at that but Mari began to bit her lip; a habit of hers when she is withholding information.

"What else?' She just stares at me at this point giving up entirely on trying to omit "in her head" unimportant pieces of information.

"He still cares. A lot! And I'll always mean so much more to him." I couldn't believe it. No wonder he'd been eyeing me down the entire morning. A cross between guilt and pure unadulterated jealousy.

"So basically he supports you as his best friend; but if this doesn't work out with us he sees it as an open invitation to try some horizontal comforting?" I hear a cough in the background turning to a red Stef who nearly choked on a strawberry.

"Allison!" Lena gawped at me.

"What? I just had to sit here and watch him not so subtly by the way eye Mariana down. We made eye contact! More then once! And don't get me started on his little snide remarks." "Oh I love teaching Jude just so I can spend time with Mariana….. There's no other place I'd rather be." Callie giggles clearly over my reaction to this.

"Weren't you just singing that same tune too?" Lena smirks rolling her eyes at me. Rubbing my neck in guilt a small smile appears on my face. "There's totally a difference.""Mhmm" being her response.

Mariana's bravery returns, stepping into my direct line of sight she grabs my chin forcing me to look at her. "We talked and I made it crystal clear he and I weren't a thing and though I still care for him that's not to be taken advantage of. He gave me his word and Zac has never broken his word with me. Besides, your just upset he reached second base before you did. Its called jealously Allison." Mariana saunters to the stairs leaving a laughing Callie, stunned Stef, amused Lena, and shocked Allison.

Shaking out of my trance I run to the edge of the hall retorting… "Can you blame me?" Causing a chorus of laughter to exist the kitchen.

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><p>Please let me know what you guys think? How do you like Mariana's and Allison relationship thus far? Is Allison being a jealous jerk for no reason? Shouldn't she trust Mariana? RR please<p> 


	2. Caught UP

Hi guys! So today I think I'll go ahead and bring the drama for you lovely people. There's another character I'm adding to the mix who has history with our beautiful Allison. Most of you know her and may be a bit surprised. There will be trouble in paradise for Alliana, lets see if their relationship is strong enough to stand the rain. There are no bad guys in this fic; (Well any bad guys who we care about.) just good people who make the wrong choices. So here goes.

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><p>This week has been hell on wheels for me. I picked up a few extra shifts at the diner with Cal not expecting my supervisor Sean at Snap &amp; Go photography to be an ass far more then usual and rearrange my schedule entirely to his benefit. I wouldn't have mind, but now my date night with Mariana on Friday couldn't happen and I knew she wouldn't be all to thrilled about it. And to top it off one of the counselors were fired from the rec center for misconduct or something along those lines, so what was suppose to be a twice a month thing turned into another full time job.<p>

I haven't seen Mari in a little over a week with my workload and class. Hell I haven't seen myself in days. I'm mean I literally haven't looked in a mirror in days. My body's on autopilot; get up for school, work, work again, work again, and then I spend my nights trying to salvage what few brain cells I have left to accomplish at least a portion of the mountain of papers and exerts I have to write. By the end of the night I'm dead to the world and life is completely drained from me. I know I'm biting off more then I can chew but I need this; my jobs are keeping a roof over my head and its too late to drop my classes. Classes may I add that I will have to pay for if I withdraw. I'm on the verge of insanity and the only thing saving me right now is the constant texts and phone calls from Mariana.

That girl is my saving grace and I feel like complete crap because if I was being honest I've been a less then stellar girlfriend. Its summer most kids my age are spending their mornings lazing on the beach and their nights getting plastered at parties without a care for tomorrow, or the day after that, or the day after that. But not I. Not responsibly independent Allison.

It's half past 5 and I enter my apartment silently cursing myself. I'm half an hour late for my shift at Snap & Go and I haven't done laundry for a week so my work uniform is probably festering under the very huge pile in the corner of my room. Running in my bedroom I trip and fall face first over the end railing of my bed. "Dammit!" Getting up I wince at the sudden pain that shot through my side, lifting my shirt I see slight bruising to my ribcage. Yeah that was definitely going to leave a nasty mark. Great just great! "ARGHHHHHHH!" I let out a frustrated growl and I know I'm done for the day. I can't do it. Searching for my phone through the array of papers and clothes on my bed I call Snap & Go.

"Thank you for calling Snap & Go. This is Beverly. How can I help you today?" My overly perky co-worker sang in the phone. I swear she was the only one of us who actually likes this job.

"Hey Bev. Its Allison. Is Sean in?" I glance nervously at the time. I know I'm late and I know Sean wont be too happy about it. Although I can guarantee he's locked in his Dad's office playing another round of solitaire while chatting away on some sketchy dating site.

"Allison! Yes he's in. But he said not to disturb him at the moment. Something about paperwork." I sense the discomfort in her tone and immediately I know what "paperwork" he claims to be doing.

"Really? That's just gross. I'm sorry you have to be there for that. But this just makes things easier for me. So would you mind passing the message I wont be coming in today. Something came up." I smile at my silent victory and my perfect timing.

I hear the groan on the other line from my less then pleased co-worker. "Come on Al my shift was suppose to end half an hour ago. I really don't want to stay and I really don't want to interrupt his spank session he's having right now."

I laugh at the complete three sixty of Bev's attitude. It amazed me how she could be all perky and jolly one moment and then all curt and blatant the next. "I know and I'm sorry but I cant come in and I'd prefer not to speak with him. You know he'll expect me to explain myself and I really don't want to talk to him while he's preoccupied. So please do this for me….." I go into whine mode and I'm sure she can see the pout I'm sporting.

"Ugh! Fine but you owe me big time! Tell Mariana I said hi and ill see her next week." With that she hangs up the phone before I can even thank her.

Glancing around my room I know I should probably get some homework in, or do some laundry; hell I should probably clean up my apartment, I'm sure the dust bunnies are having a field day. But I haven't had a night off in a week and I've been missing Mariana terribly. Its almost sickening how much so. Looking at the clock on my nightstand I see its fifteen minutes past six. Dinner should be starting soon at the Fosters and I'd like to stop at the store to get Mariana some flowers before I go over there. The flowers will be a nice surprise and it'll help ease the bomb of cancelling yet another date night. Moving to my closet I rummage about my things trying to find something to put on after I take a much needed shower, when my phone starts buzzing again. Expecting it to be Sean inquiring about why I decided to call out I answer without looking at the ID. "Hello?"

"Allison thank god you answered. Are you busy?" My attitude immediately changes. I should've looked at my caller ID. "Yea I kind of am. What do you want Lou?"

"I really need to talk to you." Her voice sounded rushed and impatient. "Can I come over?"

Searching for my sneakers I grumble in slight irritation. I hadn't spoken to her for months, and then she mysteriously pops up after she hears "through the grapevine" that I'm no longer single. Typical Lou. "Actually I'm headed out."

"Please I really need you right now." I run my hands roughly through my hair. I shouldn't be surprised, Lou always expected me to drop things on a dime whenever she called. Like she still held that much importance to me.

Exhaling sharply I try desperately to control my annoyance that's quickly boiling to anger. "I can't right now I'm sorry really. Later? Tonight? I have plans and this is last minute Lou. I'll call you later OK?" With that I hang up and head for my shower hoping that it'll wash off some of the built up tension and stress from the unexpected phone call.

Out the shower and dressed I peer at my watch, fifteen minutes until seven; I'd showered, dressed, and comb out my hair in record time. I grab my keys and walk out locking up and heading to the store. Pulling into the parking lot I spot Brandon walking through the entrance. "Brandon!" He turns searching and spots me immediately. Locking up I run over to catch him. "Hey dude. What you doing here? Dinner's in a few right?"

"I could ask you the same thing. I thought you were working tonight?" He raises his eyebrows in question.

"Well if you must know. I called out, thought I'd surprise Mariana with flowers and a bow."

"A bow? What's the bow for?"

"To put on me of course. Surprise with flowers and a gift…I'm the gift. Get it?" The dumbfounded look I'm given causes a me to chuckle.

"Yeah. I guess that's romantic. Anyways tonight's movie night I'm just picking up some more snacks. You know how mama is on junk food so I have to supply the good stu-."

"Allison!"

Brandon and I both turn abruptly at the intruder. My face falls instantaneously. This cant be happening right now. Lou strides over to us a friend I don't recognize in tow. "Hey! Funny running into you here." Her eyes give me a once over before switching to Brandon a look of confusion clearly across her face. I peer over to Brandon who seems dazed and I'm mentally cursing the cosmic gods for putting me in this situation. Last thing I needed was for Lou to start running her mouth supplying information I'd definitely need explanations for. I had to put an end to this encounter fast and by the look on Brandon's face he would obviously be of no help. Great! Just freaking great! Grabbing Brandon by the collar I throw a quick "can't talk right now I'll call". Before I drag him into the store. Avoidance that was the best technique I could muster off the top of my head.

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><p>So is Lou going to get Allison caught up? And for those that are wondering Lou is the character from the show. I do love her and her voice and I wanted to work her in here in some way. I hope you guys are enjoying everything thus far. RR please<p> 


	3. You Lie To The People You Love

So here goes guys! Hope you like this next chapter. Its full of humor and flirting. So enjoy!

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><p>We arrive at the Fosters shortly after our trip. Not before being cornered by Lou and her friend again and having to exchange pleasantries. It took everything in my power not to blow up when Lou asked Brandon out on Friday night; and inviting her friend and myself as well. I purposely left out the fact that I'd be working seeing as Brandon seemed really excited about the prospect of a date. His palms were sweaty and the tinge of a stutter gave it away. I agreed wanting this situation to be over as soon as possible. It wasn't that her friend wasn't pretty. I just wasn't interested and I knew the only reason Lou insisted I come was to keep tabs on me while she flirted shamelessly with a completely lost Brandon. He didn't have a clue. Besides this Vanessa girl didn't hold a candle to Mariana.<p>

I was relieved when Brandon didn't start asking questions. Not that I felt I needed to answer to him but I really didn't want him saying anything to Mariana. She didn't know about Lou and if I had anything to do with it, she wouldn't. It wasn't safe or smart and I'd prefer not to have Mari involved in any of her chaos or drama.

Brandon and I arrive shortly before everyone could settle into the movie. "Hey did you get everything you needed from the store?" Lena who had been fluffing pillows glanced over to the foyer. "Oh hi sweetheart. I thought you'd be working today. Your just in time, its movie night."

I try to seize Brandon but his giddiness for his date Friday overpowered my stern glare. "No but I have a date Friday night!" Brandon bounced excitedly.

"How many times do I have to tell you Brandon. In order for it to be a date she has to know about it too." Jesus snickered clearly pleased with himself. Two seconds later a pillow zips through the air clipping his ear. "Hey!" Laughs erupt in the room. Stef winks at Brandon before squeezing my arm acknowledging my presence.

Rolling his eyes Brandon states. "I have her number here. Besides Allison was there, this definitely is a date." Showing off his forearm the name and number were in plain view.

Before he can continue Mariana appears from upstairs with Zac and a small box in tow. "Hey babe! I thought you worked." I cant be upset with her because that smile gets me every time, so instead I narrow my eyes at a clearly upset Zac. "Hey yea I was suppose to but something came up. I wanted to surprise you." Handing over the flowers and placing the bow on my head I yell "Surprise" causing my love to giggle and shake her head. "Oh yea and Beverly says hi and see you soon."

I'm not a completely rude person so I decide to at least pretend he's not invisible. "Zac." He gives me a small nod before waving his goodbyes and bee-lining for the door. "So new rules now? Ex's are allowed upstairs alone without supervision?

Callie walks over to me squeezing my arm tightly. "Relax Mariana was giving him their breakup box. You know all the boxes you have stored in your second bedroom you claim is kitchen ware." She grins knowingly.

"Hey you got one too?" Jesus eyes my forearm.

Callie's grip on my arm displayed a number almost identical to Brandon's only a different name appeared. Grabbing my arm from Callie, Mariana inspects it amused yet suspicious. "Vanessa hmmm. I take it you and Brandon plan on doubling?" Brandon shots me an apologetic smile before taking his seat next to Jude on the sofa.

"I figure since Zac has been in a bit of a stomp lately maybe he could use a pick me up." Mariana's expression changes from amused to skeptical. Sighing I know this doesn't look good so I go with the truth. "Its not my fault your brother has no game whatsoever. He was falling fast. Her friend was there and it would've been rude not to engage. I like to think of it as my good deed for the day."

"Hey! I resent that! Cat got my tongue once and after that everything was smooth sailing." Brandon crosses his arms defensively.

"Are you kidding? Jude could've hit them with a pokemon pick up line and fared far better then you." Jesus and Stef buckled over the couch in fits, while Lena tried to suppress her grin. Jude turned at least ten shades of red and Callie giggled hiding behind the case of their choice movie for tonight. It was harsh but he had basically threw me under the bus and right now an upset Mariana was the last thing I needed.

"Besides lets look at the bigger picture here. B has a date! With a very hot brunette may I add. What was her name? Lou right?" I figure getting the spotlight off of me will ease Mariana's and I argument later. "Yea." The blush that creeps up his face is immediately replaced with horror. "Wait your not going on your date?" Before I can respond Brandon lets out a loud yelp. Callie has made her way over next to Jude and looking intently at the DVD case. Rubbing the back of his head annoyed Brandon sits back settling for silence.

"Actually if your not busy Jesus, you could go for me. I doubt bringing my girlfriend along would be ok. Besides someone will definitely need to be there to keep conversation going seeing as your brother cant form words correctly in front of this girl."

Walking by he high fives in agreement. "No problem dude. So got it covered!…. Hey you remember the chicks from the pier? How that one girl kept trying to get you to adjust her riding gear on the jet skis. So obvious she just wanted you to rub…" Jesus was lost in his rant.

"Jet skis?!"

"Girls at the pier?"

Mariana and Stef speak simultaneously. Smiling weakly Jesus takes his place on the floor in front of Callie. "Sorry I forgot."

Sensing a new wave of quips and retorts Lena changes the subject. "Jude hunny why don't you put the movie in?"

Everyone gets comfortable and I seat myself in the nearest armchair, pulling Mariana into my lap. "You can yell at me later. Right now I'm going to enjoy a movie cuddled up with my girlfriend, if you don't mind." Goosebumps form behind Mariana's ear, the combination of my warm breathe and lips. Most of our arguments were kept at bay whenever I'd pull her into a hug or some form of bodily contact. I feel her relax in my embrace. "Your still in the dog house." Chuckling I give my full attention to the movie and enjoy spending time with the family I've come to love.

Half way through the movie I hear light snores coming from the other side of the room. Lena's head is cradled on Stef's chest while Callie's feet rest in her lap. Jesus has now managed to sprawl out on the floor; while Jude has moved from his seat on the sofa to the floor engrossed in the movie. Callie is texting away on her phone and Brandon must have escaped upstairs unknowingly.

Jesus and Stef are battling in snores now and Jude glares at them before turning up the volume. Callie and I make eye contact before giggling. My slight movement causing Mariana to wake up from her slumber. She moves her head from the crook of my neck and replaces her lips. Trailing light kisses down my pulse line. The growl that followed was out of reflex but not any less awkward. Cal groans in discomfort and Mari try's to stifle her laughter. I throw a sorry to Callie's disapproving glower. "Take it outside!" She whispers before side glancing at Jude and her Moms. "My room?" I peer down at Mariana. If Stef and Lena woke up they'd be upset; but Mari had that look in her eyes and no didn't even seem like an option. The movie was only half way through which would give me forty-five minutes of uninterrupted alone time with Mariana. I'd take it were I could. "Let's go." I managed a husked whisper.

Hand in hand Mari and I head up the stairs. Once we entered her room in a matter of seconds I have her planted firmly against her bedroom door. "So does this mean I'm forgiven?" My body is pressed snug against hers and my thumb begins to trace light circles down her throat; exactly where her lips were on mine minutes ago.

"No, I haven't spent much time with you lately so I'll save our disagreements to family movie nights and chaotic dinners." My laugh bubbles in my chest.

"You know I have no intentions on calling this number. You know you're the only person I have eyes for right?" I search Mariana's gaze. "The wing-womaning with your brothers is more so me trying to fit in. You know?…."

"Wing-womaning? Is that even a word?

My eyebrows arch in defense. " Yes! In my very own personal dictionary. That's not the point. I'm saying it's a great way to get to know them; and if I can help them find someone who makes them as overjoyed as you me, then it's a public service really." The genuine smile that appeared caused my heart to do that fluttering thing it often did since Mariana entered my life.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

We stare at each other for a moment before my lips are met with persistent cool ones. I'm pushed near the bed and Mari straddles me as I fall backwards. I can't hold my grin in any longer.

"What are you grinning about?" Mari sits up a bit love pouring from her eyes.

"I should come over more often with numbers placed on various parts of my body. It'll be fun to watch you inspect for them if anything." Mariana's face morphs to one of shock causing her second of relapse to weaken her death grip on my waist. I quickly maneuver her flipping and towering over her in seconds. She lands with an "oomph" as I collapse in a fit of giggles.

"Oh so your thinking of making this a regular thing?" Her voice is full of humor but her eyes flash briefly with fear.

Setting all jokes aside I stare unwavering into doubtful eyes. "It wont happen again. Your brothers will have to fend for themselves from now on. Besides I have a girlfriend who I'm absolutely crazy about and she's not into sharing."

Mariana exhales a smile before swatting my arm. "You're a hand full you know that?"

"As long as I'm in your hands, I'm ok with that." Our earlier distraction was forgotten as I showed Mariana exactly how handsy I could be.

Our very intense make out session ended abruptly with Callie bursting into the room.

"Really guys? I said take it outside. Not make yourself more comfortable and head to bed." Obviously irritated and anxious she cuts me off before I can argue. Throwing her hands into the air. "You two have all of two minutes before Moms are up here!"

Jumping from my comfortable position I lunge for my shirt thrown carelessly minutes ago due to my drunken libido and increasing body temperature. "Dammit Cal! You could've started with that!" Mariana runs over to her mirror trying to gain some resemblance of composure. Her flushed appearance and swollen rosy lips were a lost cause.

The knob turns and Callie steps back behind the door. Stef enters while Lena keeps her stance at the doorway. Sitting next to me Stef places her hand on my knee. "Callie you can step from behind the door." Lena pulls it just enough for Callie to slip through. Mariana is sat frozen at her dresser. "Since you felt so obliged to warn them of our arrival mind reiterating the rules."

Blushing slightly Callie looks guiltily between Mari and I. "No boyfriends or girlfriends allowed upstairs alone without one of you being present and especially after ten even if there isn't school."

I can't hide my embarrassment and shame for defying house rules. I always played by the book, Mariana just clouded my judgment sometimes. "I'm sorry. It's just I haven't been able to see Mariana with my crazy schedule, much less spend some time alone with her. I just miss her a lot." I drop my head hoping to gain the desired effect. Glancing up I see a heartfelt Lena and a torn Stef.

Sighing she squeezes my knee before tucking a stray hair behind my ear. "I get that sweets and I still think your overdoing it. Just try to miss Mariana with clothes on please. I don't want the boys thinking this kind of behavior is ok. I still haven't gotten over the incident were I walked in on a very exposed Brandon and Tahlia in my bathroom. I don't think I can take anymore naked hormonal teenagers."

"So what? Wait, I'm off the hook?" Mariana asks her mother surprise in her voice.

"Oh no your in trouble Miss Thang. Lena's smile contradicted her tone. "More volunteers are needed at the rec center. You start Friday!"

"But I have dance rehearsal Friday! Haley will kill me if I don't go." Mari sinks next to me my arm wrapping around her out of instinct as she heaves a sigh of defeat.

"Its ok babe I work Friday. I'll talk to Larry maybe he can move you over to the events department or something. Your in air conditioning and you guys have your own lounge; which no one ever uses. You can dance for me there. I'll be sure to let Haley know how- OW!" I rub the back of my arm were Stef roughly pinched me. Lena throws her hands up announcing she's done with the conversation. Callie is leaning against the door frame no longer able to hold herself upright eyes streaming with tears and her face tight in laughter.

Staring at Mariana Stef removes herself from the spot next to me. "I think we'll be talking to Larry on Friday. Lights out in ten minutes you two. And by you two I mean Callie and my other death wishful daughter. Allison five minutes starting now. Don't make me come back." Feeling as if her threat was absorbed Stef kisses both Mari and I on our temples. Heading for the door she captures Callie in a bear hug and feathered kisses. "Love you my sweets!" Different endearments of love followed a cheesing Stef to her bedroom.

"So I better get going. I doubt your moms are going to bed anytime soon." Snuggling up to me more, the whimper of defiance rang clear in my ear.

"She said you had five more minutes." Her clutch is tight but her yawn gives way to how tired she really must be. Demanding she lay in bed she obliges with little protest. I tuck her in marveling at how beautiful she is. Through closed eyes and a sleepy voice she manages a "text me when you get home."

I can't help but smile. "You'll be asleep by then babe. You wont get it."

Opening her eyes for a moment Mari cradles my face. "When I fully wake up I'll know you arrived safe at home in bed. Missing me as much as I'm missing you."

"Wow really?" Callie rolled her eyes at our display of gush. "You two are sickening I swear." Kissing Mariana once more I head to the door. "Your not going to tuck me in too? I don't get a bed time story?" Her grin widens at her own banter.

"Yea I got a book for you. Its called the Finger that Soared." Callie giggled causing her eyes to crinkle a bit more. "Goodnight Cal." "Goodnight Al" Shutting the door I leave with the click of Callie's bedside lamp as my final goodbye.

I arrived home shortly, the feeling of isolation and emptiness following. After being around the Fosters for so long a person could get used to their busy lifestyle. Someone was always around which made it hard to stupor in pity and self-loathe. However when I got home all of those feelings slapped me right in the face.

My door bell ringing breaks me out of my thoughts. I shot off a text to Mariana and Stef, knowing Stef would call if I didn't; an unspoken rule between us since I'd started staying so late at the Fosters. I catch the door on its last ring.

"You can't be serious?!" I huff in exhaustion. I'm too tired for this but I cant ignore the tear stained pleading eyes so I move to the side letting her enter. "After that stunt you pulled today I shouldn't let you in. And your definitely calling and canceling that date Lou. It wasn't right and you know it." I bolt my door and pad over to the couch to remove the cushions.

"I'm sorry. I just really needed to talk to you and he was kind of there. Besides he's cute, so it wasn't completely in vain."

I disappear in the back to emerge seconds later with sheets and pillow. "Unless you plan on taking it anywhere I advise you to end it now. That's my girlfriends brother your toying with and I don't like it. Any of this! I have to tell Mariana eventually that I've lied to her and I really don't want to list increasing. Meaning I don't want her to know about us if she doesn't have to. Got it! For once try not to be the self-centered person I know your not." With that I leave a broken and exhausted brunette. I close my door and lock it just in case she decides to pull the I can't sleep card. I really didn't feel like comforting her; and the only girl I wanted wrapped in my arms tonight and for the rest of my nights was Mariana Foster.

* * *

><p>So she came over anyways… I don't know about you guys but I'm ready to find out what's the deal with Allison and Lou. We know they have history but what's their story? I'm super anxious. How about you guys? RR please<p> 


	4. Overreacting

Hey guys. I'm sorry for the delay I've started school just recently and a second job so my time isn't as abundant as it once was before. Any who, here goes another chapter. I feel the drama nearing!

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><p>I'm awoken to the smell of bacon, eggs, and a soft melody coming from my kitchen. Scanning my room I try to place the smell and the events of last night. My mind immediately tuning in to Lou; who tended to do things how she deemed fit and frankly I felt that this time it'd cost a lot more then a crass words and broken hearts. Sliding from under my blanket I pad to my bathroom to wash away my morning breathe and brush the wild mess I called hair. Following my nose to the kitchen I'm greeted with a pants less brunette who's voice brings so many memory's crashing my brain, and I hadn't even fully awoken.<p>

"You didn't have to cook breakfast you know."

Startled, Lou jumped nearly dropping the hot skillet. "Oh ummm Good Morning. I wanted to thank you for letting me crash your bach pad. And I remembered how much you loved my meat lover's omelet's. So Bon Appetit!"

Taking a seat I eye my plate skeptically. While she saunters to the cabinets grabbing mugs for deliciously smelling coffee. As she reaches for the cupboard my eyes unconsciously travel to her well rounded backside; emphasizing her lack of pants once more. "Could you maybe put on some pants?"

Lou turns arching her eyebrow a smirk marring her face. I realized I'd admitted to gawking unintentionally. I can't hold her gaze so I try to cover the blush that's slowly rising up by neck by drinking the orange juice she'd so graciously poured me moments before. "Thinking of old times Mills?"

Breakfast was a nice gesture but I knew boundary's were needed and something told me I wouldn't exactly have a vacant sofa tonight either.

"No…..Just I don't think my girlfriend would appreciate my ex around me without clothes. You know it not being a good look and all." Its too early to argue, so I settle for a more resolved even tone. Lou walks over to the couch retrieving her shorts from the night before.

"Did the old man flip shit last night again?" I note the slight bruising above her jaw line.

"I'm ok. Just going to steer clear of the house for a few days. I told John to give him time to cool off and sober up. Things were pretty bad when I left." Her eyes looked so deject, so lost and it hurt seeing her like this, It made things complicated. I'd grown up with Lou. She'd had always been the quirky eccentric breathe taking girl next door; who showed me what it really meant to let go and feel. My heart still ached for her at times, even if we weren't together. Lou was a constant reminder of the girl who'd changed my life all those years ago.

Every fiber in my being screamed bad idea, but my heart spoke before my brain could process. "You know it can't be permanent; and I'd have to talk it over with Mariana, but I do have a spare room. If you could clean it out and throw in for rent occasionally it's yours."

By now she'd move to sit in front of me playing with her food in immense concentration. "I thought you didn't want her to know about us…." Her voice was just above a whisper.

" Look as much as I'm freaking out that Mari will dump me out on my ass when we finally do talk about everything, I am worried for you. And at the end of the day Mari would want you to be in a environment where you felt safe. She has an amazing heart, just like you." I sit my fork down and just stare at the beautiful girl in front of me. She did have a great heart but somewhere along the way she just got careless with it.

Lou gets up with her plate and places it into the sink. Turning to me she smiles that smile that caused me to fall head over heels years ago. "You know I do feel safe here." Running over she engulfs me into a hug all too familiar. Inhaling her scent I clutch her a bit closer. This was ok right. Just a hug?…. Callie and I hug all the time. I could do this.

"I miss how things used to be." I kiss her temple and enjoy our embrace a second more before releasing my hold. She sighs reluctantly.

"Me too…." was all I managed before the familiar ring tone of Mariana blasted through my living room. "Morning babe!" I see Lou roll her eyes before disappearing in the bathroom.

"Morning mi amor! I dreamt about you last night."

I smile because I'm well aware Mari is still snuggled in bed, sleep still in her eyes. I had to admit I loved being the first person she spoke to in the morning. Suddenly a wave of guilt washed over me. I eyed the bathroom door almost sure I would narc right in that moment.

"So love muffin I wanted to let you know I'd be a bit late tonight in case you came over for dinner after work." I could hear the hesitation on the other line. She wanted to tell me something but was second guessing herself.

"Love muffin? You've definitely been hanging around Callie and Wyatt too much." I smile into the phone trying to lighten her mood.

Mari giggles before continuing, "Oh you secretly love the pet names I give you." The momentary silence is followed by her exhaling sharply. "Ummm I kind of told Zac id go to see a play with him at the local theater later and then may be for ice cream."

I mentally counted to ten or I'd go off like a nuclear bomb and I'd been trying so hard to work on my jealousy issues with Zac lately. "So you agreed to a date with him?" I tried to keep my tone even but as what I was told started to sink in I realized it was a lost cause.

"No not a date just friends enjoying the summer. I haven't gotten out much and I thought it would be nice. Plus I've really wanted to see this play for awhile, but you've been super busy so….."

"Oh so now its my fault my girlfriend is going out on a date." Out of habit I run my hand through my hair until it lands on the base of my neck. "Really Mari? I'm trying not to blow up about this. I even used the ten second relaxation technique you taught me."

"Babe that's why I'm telling you. I don't want you freaking out on me. You have to remember Zac and I were friends before anything else and he knows my rules. I just would really like to get out." I could her Mari treading lightly with her words. She knew this would upset me. And a part of me couldn't help but think how huge of a hypocrite I was being but I didn't trust Zac. Not in the slightest, especially when it came to Mari.

"I know you've made commitments and I know sometimes that requires canceled dates or being late to pick me up occasionally and I've been nothing but understanding. This isn't a date just two friends enjoying a play and ice cream. If I were going with Wyatt or Matt you wouldn't object. I don't see the problem now. You trust me don't you?" Mariana's tone was accusing and I could sense her patience thinning.

"You know what fine. Go on your whatever it is with Zac. I just wish you'd ask me before you'd agreed to it." This conversation was slowly getting out of hand but my jealousy was clouding my logical abilities.

"So you don't trust me? Allison that's completely uncalled for. At least I'm telling you. Which is more then I can say for some." Mariana by passed annoyed and went straight to pissed. I knew I was overreacting but all I heard was she and Zac alone in a darkroom where he had rein to bore holes through her he pleased with his eyes and I had no way of stopping it. God! I wish Mari wasn't so oblivious to the way he looked at her. Even I could see he was still in love with her. If anything the distance made it increase tenfold.

As silence was met on the other line all I could hear was Mari's ragged breathing. Oh yeah she was definitely pissed. "Actually you know what I'll call you later when you're a lot more level headed. I don't like talking to you when you get like this. I'll give you a call before I leave, maybe by then you'll have decided to grow up. Bye Allison"

Before I could muster a goodbye the line went dead. As if on cue Lou emerged from the bathroom. "Is that my toothbrush? I'm answered with a toothy grin and a not so sincere apology.

Making her way to the kitchen sink she spits before turning to me. "Its hard to break old habits." Shrugging her shoulders bashfully.

"Yeah, you had that horrible habit when we were together. In fact I remember trying to break it then as well." I was already on edge because of my argument with Mari and it only amplified as an instant rush of memory's exploded in me. Shared experiences, shared secrets, shared fears; days of exploring our worlds, nights of exploring each other.

At one point and time id be welcomed to Lou's witty quips and sultry looks over something as mundane as breakfast. There'd been a time were she had consumed my every waking thoughts before all of this. Before we'd reached the point of no longer caring to cover lies and spare truths. I shake my head furiously in disapproval, I needed to stay focus and reminiscing after fighting with my GIRLFRIEND wasn't making things any easier. Lou recognized the struggle of memory's on my face. Lou recognized everything and I'm sure she'd over heard Mari and I heated argument moments ago.

"I still think about it too. You know…. Before everything got all messy." Her gaze never falters as she shuffles lightly on her feet.

I have no words for her so I just trail back to my room praying Mariana will forgive me once she sees how much my truths really haunt me.

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><p>After breakfast I decided that a shower would help clear my mind. I had a full night of work was ahead of me; I wasn't needed at the rec center today and I would've been ecstatic about it if I didn't have a double shift at Snap &amp; Go, Bev choosing today to cash in her IOU. I threw the thought of being any type of productive today out the window, I knew my mind would eventually start thinking up scenarios of how Mari and Zac's date were going. To top it of I had two paper's due by the beginning of next week and I hadn't even started my thesis for either one. No one could begin to understand how exhausted I was.<p>

Freshly showered and standing in front of my mirror I shot a quick prayer to genetics. I hadn't gotten a full night of sleep in over a week yet there was no evidence of it. Since Mari and I had barely been able to see each other my cell phone bill had gone up tremendously. I would've been without said landline if my bill some how magically didn't get paid every month. Sitting on the edge of my bed I smiled to myself, it was overwhelming how accepting Lena and Stef could be. My mother had passed away many years ago and up until id met Callie; the only women in my life were usually sorry excuses for step moms or sleeping with me. Not exactly mommy material. The only parental figure I had in my life was my nonexistent father, who was more worried about his next trophy wife then his daughter.

My phone ringing breaks me out of my train of thought. "Hello?"

"Allison its Sean, your boss." His tone was overly iced. I don't know why he felt the need to announce his position as "bossman" every time he called. I'd worked at Snap & Go for almost two years now I was well aware of his job title. Even though technically Sean was just a supervisor. His father owned the store but Sean walked around as if it belonged to him. Actually he thought quite highly of himself; considering himself to be God's gift to earth and made sure you were aware of how lucky you were to be in his presence. A bit far fetched if you asked me.

"If this is about me calling out yesterday I'm sorry. But I had an emergency that needed my immediate attention." I hear ruffling in the background and my stomach turns at the thought of what exactly he may have been doing before he called me.

"No you got it covered although thirty minutes late is unacceptable. I was calling because I would be cutting your shift tonight. We hired a new girl and my father wants her trained by the end of next week, so as the boss I figured it was my responsibility to do so." His tone was even yet still held the vibe of creeper in it. This chick must be hot or else Sean would've pawned her off on one of us. Sean usually did nothing at work bringing an entire new meaning to the word lackey.

I instantly felt mercy for this girl. I knew what it felt like to be on the receiving end of Sean's not so welcoming advances. I would come home many nights washing the scum of his words off of me, he really had a hard time of understanding the word no; that was until I had a long talk with daddy. Something about an sexual harassment lawsuit in his future didn't sound appealing to the old man.

"Okay. Umm thanks for the heads up. Oh and Sean don't forget next week we have evaluations. I hope you realize all employees even new ones are allowed their opinion of staff and how management is handling the workload." That was my subtle way of telling Sean to take it easy. He knew I'd talk to Mr. Thilme if need be. I wasn't his biggest fan and I made sure he was mindful of that every chance I got.

"I know exactly what suppose to happen next week Allison. I am your superior, I do suggest you remember that." I could hear his irritation loud and clear, the man was really full of it. "I'm done here so we'll see you tomorrow, and try to make it on time. Like you said we do have evaluations next week." With this he hung up not waiting for a reply.

So my day in a matter of minutes had cleared. Any other time I would've called Mari planning a day to make up for all the other days I'd missed with my amazingly considerate girlfriend. But I was still upset with her. It was as if she continued to throw her and Zac's friendship in my face. She knew how he felt about her, hell he'd told her. I couldn't shake the feeling she was doing this to get a rise out of me. I knew I was being absolutely unjust about this. I had my ex girlfriend who I'd lived with and shared a bed with at one point and time staying with me. Ok scratch that I was being extremely petty about this. But I knew there was no way on earth I'd every cheat on Mariana. No matter how in love I'd been at one point and time with Lou. I couldn't see myself allowing something like that to happen. I also couldn't get the fact that Zac had already so boldly kissed Mari.

I exist my bed room in hopes that one fiery brunette had left to go about her day. I didn't want to deal with anyone, figuring I'd wallow in my own pity until dinner at the AdamFosters. Maybe I'd call Callie, try for a movie date or lunch. Well honestly just get details about this non date Mariana was going on with Zac. With no such luck I walked in my kitchen to find Lou tidying up.

"I know you were headed for work so I cleaned up a bit for you." She dried her hands on the green dish towel by the stove. The kitchen looked spotless and I began to remember how much of a neat freak Lou had always been. Maybe having her around wouldn't be such a bad idea, at least the place would be clean.

"Thanks but I don't work today so I would've gotten to it eventually." I rummage through the refrigerator more so for show then anything.

"You want to talk about?" Her eyes searched mines concern etched in her features.

We stare at each other for a minute before I give in and turn away walking over and plopping down on the sofa. "Not really, but if I don't ill go stir crazy because my girlfriend is out on a non date date with her ex boyfriend slash best friend if that makes sense." Leaning my head on the back of the sofa I hear laughter barreling from the kitchen.

"Your laughing at me? Really? I'm a big ball of self-pity and you decide to laugh at me?" My pout widens another indication that I was overreacting. She was seriously laughing at me.

"Still the irrationally jealous Allison I remember I see." Lou comes over and sits next to me on the couch. "I just find it funny that you've some how managed to forget you do have your ex girlfriend living with you. For the past few nights if I recall correctly, and I don't see Mariana accusing or knocking down any doors. Oh wait! I forgot she has no idea. Hmmm yea your right she's being completely untrustworthy by going and hanging out with her friend." Lou's perfectly sculpted eyebrows rise in a condescending manner, before she playfully shoves my shoulder.

I grab a pillow and try not so successfully to smother myself. Lou was right, absolutely without a doubt right. I was being a jerk about the entire thing. "Why do I have a feeling that your right and I'm being an ass about the situation?"

'Because I am and you are." Lou's grin was infectious.

"Ok so maybe just maybe I've pushed the panic button unjustly. But I don't like the way he looks at her. Or how he's knows things about her that I don't. Like her love for theater, I mean what guy do you know actually enjoys theater? I'm a girl and I can't sit thirty minutes through a play without counting sheep and ending in a deep sleep." Lou's staring at me with this incredulously look on her face.

"Did I say I don't like the way he looks at her?" I know my argument is dieing quickly but I feel I have a valid reason to worry.

Lou places her hand no my knee immediately ceasing my ranting. "I'm sure Mariana could argue the same thing. I bet she doesn't know about your massive fear of spiders. That when you were nine you broke your left kneecap trying to skate board off the roof of your house and only when its really cold the joint tends to lock up." Tucking my hair behind my ear Lou runs her finger along the side of my neck. "This little scar that is barely visible now happened on the one of few fishing trips you would go on with your father, a fishing hook gone array."

I knew I should look away but I couldn't Lou knew way too much about me. She knew everything and in this moment I couldn't deny the way her eyes were scanning over my every feature as if reacquainting herself with and old friend. The taste of blood invaded my mouth as I bite down on my lip. Something was happening and I was too frozen in place to stop it.

"How when your really nervous you chew on the inside of your lip." Lou's thumb lightly brushing against my bottom lip acknowledging my bad habit I'd had since I was a small girl. Before locking her eyes with mines.

Shaking my head I get up and head to the kitchen intending on rinsing out my mouth. I didn't have to see it to know Lou's eyes carried a bit of disappointment at my sudden withdrawal. "That's different Lou. We've known each other our entire lives." I clench the edge of the sink trying reel in the sudden wave of emotions in me.

"I'm not saying it's the same thing Allison." Exhaling sharply Lou walks over to the sink folding her arms cautiously around her chest while using the sink as leverage. "I'm saying that Zac was there before you and as much as you don't like it he experienced things with her that you weren't around to. Its not his fault it's just how life works. He'll always have memory's with her that don't include you and you need to get over that. Because what matters now is that she's with you. Your what's important. Your who she chooses to make memory's with now. So take pride in that. Besides I don't like this Allison. This sulking girl in front of me I don't know. It really does not look good on you." Lou flashes me her signature smile and wink jokingly pushing me with her hip while heading the restroom.

"Thank you." If I was being honest with myself Lou was right and more so it shocked me. She actually sounded as if she was on board with the idea of Mariana and I. Something I never thought I'd see coming from Lou. "You know for everything."

"No problem. Now if we're done with all the sentimental bonding we're going out. I just so happen to know of a concert that's happening right now by a certain person favorite band. I think radiohead is what their called."

My smile turns blinding. "You didn't!"

"I did." Was all I heard before the door was shut.

This day was turning out to be quite interesting. I knew I'd have to talk to Mariana later but I'd prefer to after her outing with Zac. And this concert seemed like a great way to clear my head.

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><p>So big blow out between Alliana! I have quite a few ideas of where I'd like this story to go. I may have deviated a bit from my original plan but I think you guys will like the change. I will write more soon. I've finally been able to get a bit of time off. So prepare for the fireworks and wars!<p> 


	5. The Reasoning Behind Lieing

Walking through the door Lou and I crashed simultaneously on the couch. To say we had a blast would be an understatement. I couldn't remember the last time I'd had such a great time with Lou. We'd danced for hours to some of my favorite songs while beat after beat echoed through the park. After we caught up with some of her friends and just reminisced about crazy adventures we'd gone on in the past. I'd lost track of time and before I knew it morning had turned into mid evening, and the sun was beginning to set beautifully on the horizon. This was one of the things I'd missed about Lou, her spontaneity. Getting up and going through the frig Lou throws me a much need cool bottle of water.

"So did I fall through or what?" Her smile beamed so brightly it could've lite half of New York for a month.

"Yes! I can say that was totally epic. I still can't believe you scored tickets. I wont ask how I'm just grateful you invited me." My smile matched hers my spirits were high and for almost two hours my mind steered clear of Zac and his ulterior motives with my girlfriend.

Standing and stretching a bit I gulp down the rest of my water. "You know I think I owe you. For today, for keeping my mind off of my problems. You really helped clear my head so to speak. It's appreciated."

Glancing at the time I figure I had a little over an hour to get ready for dinner at the Fosters. I needed to talk to Mariana to get some things off my chest and I finally had the level head to do so. I knew Lou was a major reason for that. She always knew how to calm me down and get me to think rationally, even if she'd been the cause of my anger. It still baffled me to this day.

"Allison…."

I turn my eyes searching for what she wanted to tell me.

"I was wondering if your not busy tonight would you like to come see me perform. I have a gig and I don't know, I thought it would be nice if you came. I tend to be less nervous when I see you out in the audience." The hesitancy was clear in her voice, her fingers tapped lightly on the bottle in her hand waiting for my response.

I had no idea Lou had started singing again. It was a surprise but a pleasant one, I'd always been her biggest fan and I knew she needed the support. More so I felt the need to, especially after everything she did for me today.

"I would love to. Just tell me when and where and I'm there?"

"Cool I'll text you later with deets."

Lou and I stood in my living room grinning like two fools. The sound of my phone beeping indicating my awaiting voicemail breaking our trance. The continuous chirping alerting me of the miss call and texts I'd received while my phone was off. I really needed to start making sure that thing was charged before I left the house. Reaching for the door Lou smiles at me once more before departing. Discarding my now empty water bottle I pick up my phone to check me messages.

"Hey Al! Call me soon. I have the afternoon off. I'll meet you at Snap & Go for lunch, Maybe then you can explain to me why Mari was snapping at everyone all morning; she was like a ticking time bomb. Or why she cancelled her plans with Zac before throwing him out on his ass. I ask because I share a room with the girl and there are eggshells all over the floor. Figuratively speaking of course. Give me a call, if you don't I'll take that as your too swamped so I'm just showing up. I know a bit stalkerish but I don't think I can handle anymore of the Spanish ranting little person upstairs. Even Jesus is afraid to come out of his room. See you at one. Much love Cal!"

"Shit! Shit! Shit!" I threw my phone on the sofa running to bathroom to wash up and change before I headed to the Fosters. How was I going to explain about my not working today? I was sure Callie had held up her promise of seeing me at work only to arrive there and find out I was off. I couldn't lie to Callie she'd read right through it. More so I couldn't hide anything from her and my slight tan I was sporting would kind of give away my day of fun in the sun. Telling Callie about my day meant telling her about Lou and I wasn't ready for that, plus I was pretty sure she'd run and tell Mariana. I mean, I almost positive sister trumps best friend in any deck.

I gave myself a once over to make sure I looked my best. I was wearing Mari's favorite green shirt, the one that fit snug and low cut but not too much to were it was deemed inappropriate and my blue ripped jeans that accentuated just how blessed I was in the asset department; with blue and white sneaker that'd I'd probably worn once since purchasing them. My make up was light and I wore more eye liner then anything bringing out the slight grey in my usually bright green eyes, my hair toppled over my shoulder in waves which usually happened a few hours after it was freshly washed. I looked hot plain and simple, and part of it was because I'd be going to see Lou perform later and really didn't want to come home and change. Maybe I could invite Callie. She'd be able to get a read on Lou and if she approved that would be another person in my corner when I finally did tell Mariana about her. Grabbing my keys and a few bills that were laying on my dresser I lock up and head out.

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><p>"Jesus get the door please!" I hear Lena yell from the kitchen.<p>

I'm waiting patiently by the front door hands buried in my pockets. To say I was nervous wouldn't even begin to describe how I was feeling. I hadn't spoken to Mari since our little tiff that morning, even though she'd said she would call me before she left. Granted she didn't go, but knowing that and the fact that she still hadn't called me gave me an idea of how angry she still must have been. Or still is. A few minutes passed before Jesus answered the door eyes still glued to the game him and Jude were in the middle of.

"Hey Allison come in. Dinner should be ready in a few." Jesus continued talking without so much as a glance in my direction.

"Hi to you too." I shove him lightly to break his game coma.

Pausing the game he grins at me before faltering a bit. "Wow you look…" A cleared throat interrupted his words before he averted his gaze embarrassed at gawking.

I look over to Jude who is grinning from ear to ear and staring at Mari who has her hands folded across her chest waiting patiently for her brother to finish his sentence.

"She looks what Jesus?" Her eyebrows rise in question and I cant help but chuckle. Even though Mari is upset with me she's still territorial and that leaves me with a glimmer of hope for our conversation later.

"Very pretty.' Jude pipes in nodding his head in agreement with his own observation.

"Well thank you Judicorn. Your very handsome yourself." He just blushes before turning his attention back to the game.

Jesus takes that as his signal to leave so he presses start and runs back to the living room side glancing and shrugging at his sister on the way.

Mari and I just stare at each other for a few minutes, neither wanting to say anything not knowing how the other would react. I wasn't upset anymore and I felt a bit guilty that'd she would cancel her plans with Zac but I wasn't going to admit that to her. I still had my reservation about their relationship and a part of me felt it was justifiable. Yet I couldn't get the days events out of my head. While my girlfriend had been home pouting and miserable over one of our very rare fights I was out partying it up with a very beautiful girl. One who happened to be my ex, it wasn't a date by a long shot. But by the way we'd acted around each other an outsider wouldn't have necessarily agreed. I wasn't overly affectionate or touchy like I am with Mariana, but there could've been a lot less of longing glances and lingering touches.

"So you guys just going to stand there and look at each other?" I hadn't even notice Brandon step into view and the snicker that came from in the living from Jesus told me he'd been standing there for a minute.

"Hello to you too Brandon." I throw him a half smile before I return my attention back to Mariana.

I was trying to read her posture. Her lips were pursed together which said to me there was something she wanted to say but didn't know how or where to begin, and her arms were crossed over her chest. I could see she was still trying to desperately to hold on to her anger but as her eyes raked my body I noted how hers betrayed her and began to soften from her tense defensive pose.

Taking that as my cue I walk the few feet that separated me from her, now only mere inches apart I slowly unwrap her arms, not breaking eye contact the entire time. Before she can even realize it I've scooped her up in a body molding hug. My face buried in her hair and the crook of her neck. I inhale sharply because I've always loved the way Mariana smells, like lilacs and fresh air. I could sense her hesitancy for only a few moments before she finally gives in and returns my hug with just as much emotion.

"I'm sorry. I was completely out of line today, and you were right. I'm sorry." My hold is a bit tight but Mari doesn't show any discomfort instead squeezing me in understanding before running her hands through my hair. A habit of hers I've come to love and find very soothing.

"It's okay. Honestly. If the roles had been reversed I'd felt the same way and you were right I should've checked with you first. It was very inconsiderate of me to assume it wouldn't bother you and I'm sorry for that. Really I am." By now Mari has started rubbing small circles over my back. I sit Mari back on her feet and cradle her face before planting a soft kiss to her lips letting her know all is forgiven. The tension from minutes ago dissipating in the air effortlessly.

"Babies I'm home!" Stef walks through the front door announcing her arrival her smile brightening once she see that Brandon, Mari and I already standing in the foyer. "Hi my sweets!"

"Hey Mom!" Jude yells from the living room still engrossed in his game with Jesus. While he just simply nods and flashes a grin to Stef.

Existing the kitchen Lena heads toward Stef love pouring from her gaze and plants a kiss on her cheek then turns in our direction her eyes welcoming as always. "Allison honey I figured that was you earlier. Dinner is ready so if you guys could go wash up and set the table that'd be great."

I smile unconsciously clutching Mariana's hand. I admired Lena and Stef's relationship. Everything about it they were so comfortable with one another and you could tell they honestly loved their family and each other deeply just by their eyes. They fit so perfectly together. Were Lena had a kind soul which most would try to take advantage of Stef was there guarding it with pure intentions and adoration. Were Stef had more of an understanding of just how cruel the world could be Lena represented just how beyond beautiful it was and nourished it in her actions everyday towards Stef. It was quite the epic love story if you ask me. Something I really wanted to strive for with Mariana.

Brandon walks over placing kisses on both of his mother's cheeks before heading upstairs to wash up. While I had been watching her mother's Mariana had been watching me a smile planted permanently on her face. Her grip tightened on my hand dragging me upstairs to wash up with her.

Reaching the bathroom Mari pushes me in before her; making sure to lock the door she attacks my lips causing me to grab onto the sink for leverage. Moving away from my lips she starts to pepper kisses along my cheek, jaw line, and neck. I hadn't expected to be tackled and the sudden rush of emotions displaying from her did come as a surprise. Trying to gather my breathe and concentrate I squeeze my eyes shut a few times. Mari was making it very difficult when her lips lightly grazed my pulse point a weakness of mines she'd found months ago.

"You look amazing, I see you wore my favorite shirt." Her lips moved along the outer shell of me ear and then retreated back just below my jaw. Halting her actions for a second her breathe sent chills down my spine and everything around me started spinning. I liked aggressive Mariana very much. She traced her fingers along the neckline of my shirt before following it with butterfly kisses. Needing to reel in my hormones I flip Mari over to were she was now leaning against the sink. Lifting her head I seized a handful of her hair tugging a bit to expose her neck, my head was still dizzy but my eyes latched with hers a moment before my lips followed suit along her neck. In response her fingers played at the hem of my shirt, her nails scraping my skin right above my jeans. The soft gasp that escaped Mari quickly wiped away any residual doubt as I got lost in the feel of her nails not so innocently kneading my skin. Using the hand I had imbed in her hair I repositioned her lips on mines my tongue skimming her bottom lip silently asking for access, which she permitted eagerly. Removing my hand from golden locks I tread Mariana's sides lifting and perching her on the edge of the sink she wraps her legs around me and moves her hands to my back entirely digging into my skin. I place my hands on her thighs treading my fingers lightly up and down her toned curves. Things were quickly getting carried away upstairs in the bathroom and I knew it was a matter of time before someone was sent to look for us. Fighting my need to consume everything Mariana and my need to be able to actually see my girlfriend in the future I stop our deep kiss. Resting my forehead on hers I reach back intertwining Mari's fingers with mines bringing them up to lips and kissing her finger tips.

"I think if we don't stop now your mom will send someone to make sure we haven't drowned. Besides if we go any further I promise I won't be accountable for my actions."

Smirking Mari places another kiss on my cheek before pushing me gently and hopping off of the sink. Turning she washes her hands and dry's them on the nearest towel.

"I'll be downstairs so hurry. Mom made her infamous chicken and steak tacos tonight and I want you to try her homemade coleslaw before the boys demolish it." Unlocking and opening the door Mari nearly clashes face first with Callie.

"Hey! Your home!" Hugging Callie she turns and swats me on my behind then bee-lines for the door Callie is conveniently blocking so I can't catch her. Giggling on her way out. Callie eyes follow Mari down the stairs before returning back to me. Leaning against the door frame she just watches me.

"Hey." I finish washing my hands and repeat Mari's earlier actions wiping my hands on the nearest towel which I'm assuming is hers.

"Hey yourself. So want to tell me what happened to you today…"

I'm avoiding her looks at all cost. Intently straightening my appearance in the mirror but my thoughts were once again on my day and a certain brunette that consumed it. "I'm sorry I should've called you. Just something came up. A friend of mines was in a bad place and needed some company. So I hung out with her today." Wasn't technically a lie.

"While your girlfriend was here sulking all day? What's going on Allison? I thought you'd been in work today. If you didn't work why'd you lie about it?" Callie is fishing for answers and by the way she's guarding the bathroom door I'm not leaving until she gets them.

"Look I'm sorry right after I got into the fight with Mari my boss called and told me he was cutting my shift. I knew I'd overreacted about the Zac thing and I didn't want to seem overbearing by telling Mari my boss mysteriously gave me the day off. I didn't want her to think she had to cancel her plans with Zac; but I was still upset and had every intention of staying home and miserable rehashing every detail of Zac and Mari's day together. Then my friend just showed up in hysterics and really needed to talk. We went out for food and ran into some people we used to know. My phone was dead so I didn't get your message until I got home. I didn't know Mari would cancel last minute or that you'd show up to my job. I'm sorry but I didn't lie it's just how things played out." I finally hold Callie's gaze I'd been partially telling the truth and I could live with that for now.

Sighing Callie nods her head in understanding and peers at me through the mirror. "I get that. Just things were looking sketch there for awhile especially since you didn't return any of my phone calls." There was still a slither of doubt in Callie's features but I played it off with my best sincere puppy dog eyes.

Shuffling nervously from each foot I glance behind Callie before looking back at her. "I take it you didn't say anything to Mariana. I mean she didn't slam the door in my face when I got here so I'm assuming she doesn't know I had the day off." Callie shakes her head no.

"I figured as much seeing as your sporting a hickey the map size Florida on your neck." Callie chuckles and turns heading to her room to change before going back downstairs.

Looking back into the mirror I spot Mariana's mark that's managed to turn shades darker in a matter of seconds. "Just great." My phone chiming gets my attention and I dig in my pocket peering at the screen while trying to access Mari's damage. Thank god I'd worn my hair down so I push my hair to hang over my shoulder the length of it being perfect to hide my hickey.

_**"Hey I go on at ten. I'm at The Rig its about fifteen minutes from your place. I'm sure you've heard of it. Try to come a little early the place is really packed. Thank you for doing this for me. I really appreciate it Allie. I'll be looking for you, can't wait.**_

_**xoxo Lou"**_

I quickly erase the message and close my phone. As much as I hated doing this I knew it'd be in best interest not to go. Especially with Callie's suspicions lurking in the air. Lou would be devastated but I couldn't afford to care at the moment. Not with what I'd be putting at risk to lose. Mariana was definitely worth a hell of a lot more then that.

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><p>By the time I'd made it downstairs everyone had been seated. About three months ago Stef and Lena had purchased a dining table that could easily sit ten people. They had gotten tired of having people stand around their kitchen island while eating more specifically after Wyatt and I took our constant dinner invitations as infinite ones. Mariana was to the left of me and Callie to my right. While Wyatt sat across from Callie and Jude across from me. Jesus and Brandon sitting to the left and right of them. Stef and Lena both took seats at the head ends of the table. The conversation didn't falter as I took my place next to Mariana who just smiled at me and continue her argument with her twin who was currently downing almost an entire bottle of hot sauce on his tacos.<p>

"Jesus stop that now. Your grossing out your sister, and frankly everyone else at the table." Stef's stern tone had no effect on Jesus as he continued to empty the bottles contents.

"That's ok babe. When he wakes up in the middle of the night stomach hurting and certain body parts on fire and exerting unmentionables I'll give him a bag of ice and some pepto. That'll teach him since he'll be up half the night." Lena sly smirk caused nearly everyone to burst into laughter at the table.

After the laughter died down conversation flowed freely.

"Hey Al!" Wyatt grinned at me before returning to make goo goo eyes at Callie across from him.

"Wyatt long time." I return his smile easily. Wyatt and I got along famously and I could see why Callie was so in love with him even if she wasn't ready to admit it herself.

"Yea I could say the same stranger. Hey which reminds me were you at the pier this morning or a little close to noon?"

I get deathly still when I see Mariana has moved her attention from her brother to Wyatt her curiosity peaking. Callie was in the middle of biting her taco when she forgot to chew.

"The pier?" She questions with a mouthful.

Conversation starts to die down around the table as everyone begins to pick up on ours.

Mariana shifts in her seat to were she is semi facing me but still looking at Wyatt, who's looking around the table with a dumbfounded expression.

"Yeah you remember babe. That concert I was trying to get you to go to with me this afternoon. Radiohead? It was at the park a few blocks down I'd been at the pier with a few buddy's of mine who were headed there." Wyatt looks over to Callie expectantly.

"And you think you saw Allison?" Mariana speaks before Callie does and I'm trying so hard to keep my cool but my hands are sweating profusely and the taco I'd tried to swallow was going down like sandpaper.

Callie peers back to me and I glance nervously around the table. I still hadn't spoken up denying Wyatt's question and I don't think I can. Every time I try to talk I can't help but feel as if my throat had a sudden bout of dehydration.

"Well yeah. I'm not sure, which is why I'm asking." Wyatt eyes squint over to mines still confused as to what is going on. "The chick with the pretty rad style and used to be in that band. Something about little sister's….."

"Lou was there?" This peeked Brandon's attention as he turns to Wyatt now interested and fully alert.

"Isn't that the young lady you have your date with Friday Brandon?" Lena stared confusingly from Brandon to Wyatt.

"Yeah her!" Wyatt motions with his fingers. "A couple of my buddies recognized her and I could've sworn I saw Allison walking with her." Wyatt is slowly starting to sense the tension and awkwardness at the table and stares down at his plate regret evident on his face for even bringing it up. "I could be wrong. She was pretty far away and I could've been hallucinating. I mean it did hit over a hundred degrees today. Talk about scorching." He moves uncomfortably in his seat before placing his hands in his lap still refusing to look up.

"Allison?" Mari's voice is small but I hear it as if she took a blow horn to my ear. "You were working today right?"

I feel six pair of eyes on me at once. Mariana's eyes boring into my side but I refuse to look at her.

"What's going on?" The unabashed Jesus speaks up. "Was Allison not suppose to be at this concert. Sounds pretty cool to me. Who was it again?" Shrugging his shoulders he deposit's a spoonful of coleslaw.

I decide I'm not ready to start giving answers so I do the one thing I've been doing. I finally look around the table everyone's gaze matching waiting for me to explain myself. Well all except Callie who already knows half the story. "Sorry Wyatt wasn't me. I was at work today. Couldn't have been me." I peek over to Callie who has turned away from me entirely. I can't read her face but I know that it will be WWII reincarnated later when I talk to her. I flat out lied, not only to everyone but to Mariana as well.

Mariana visibly relaxes as she looks back at Wyatt, who shrugs his shoulders nodding his head in admission. Everyone silently taking my answer for what it wasn't the truth. Immediately conversation picks up, Mari keeps throwing glances at me and I place a small smile on my face although there is nothing genuine about it. I can't believe I just lied and worst of all Callie knows. I know she wont make a scene, she's not that type of person. But the disappointment radiating from her side of the table is sickening. I look down at my plate not so hungry anymore, as I run my hands through my hair. Then it hits me, how did Brandon know Lou used to be in a band?

"How'd you know Lou was in a band?" I don't say names specifically but my question is directed to Brandon. I don't remember her telling him about anything like that the one time we did run into one another. In fact I do remember telling her to leave Brandon alone, which according to his earlier statement she apparently hadn't done.

"Lou told me. We've kind of been talking back and forth for the past couple of days. She's a really cool girl, we have a lot in common I think." Brandon is smiling now and I see how giddy he's starting to get just mentioning her.

I nod my head in acknowledgement, continue with appearances while I move my food around on my plate. I can't help the feeling of anger that swells. I had told Lou to leave Brandon alone. She'd completely defied my orders and to top it off she wanted to act as if she was supportive of my relationship. To think I'd almost believed her, I knew she was up to no good. This had scheming written all over it. Suddenly apart of me was happy I wouldn't be showing up to her gig. I couldn't stand the thought of looking at her right now.

"Allison you ok?"

I look over to Jude who has concern written all over his face. "Yeah I'm fine buddy just a little tired."

"Its just I think your having an allergic reaction to the food." Jude brows fury before he sits his fork down and pushes his plate further up the table.

This catches both and Lena and Stef's attention. "Allison you aren't allergic to anything up here are you?" Lena burst out into full mother mode while everyone at the table is looking at me trying to pin point what exactly Jude is talking about.

"I feel fine Lena just a bit tired. Jude buddy why do you think I had a reaction to something. Is my face swollen?" I look at Jude who is watching me on the verge of tears.

Mariana turns to me letting out a small gasp before quickly covering her mouth and turning ten shades of red. I have no idea what's going on and I take it Jesus has caught on because he's toppled over his chair he's laughing so hard he can't breathe. Callie has a small smile playing at her lips although she's trying fiercely not to show it. Brandon and Wyatt have now caught on as well and Wyatt has joined in with Jesus while Brandon looks almost embarrassed. Stef is to my right so she can't see and is at a complete loss looking to her wife for answers, who has started blushing and trying to get Jesus to stop laughing.

"Your neck." Mariana whispers before returning her gaze back to her hands in her lap, turning two shades darker.

"Will someone tell me what's going on?" Stef's confusion has turned into annoyance for being out of the loop for so long.

"Allison has a hickey the size of Mount Dora on her neck." Jesus decides to share through gulp fulls of air. "Didn't know you had it in you Mari?"

"JESUS!" Stef and Lena yelled in unison.

Jesus laughs harder while Jude faces scrunches up realizing his misunderstanding. Mariana can no longer suppress her giggles as she try's at best to avoid her mother's reprimanding gazes. I know I'm about as red as a lobster now and I feel the heat rolling off of my face. My worries forgotten as I share this awkward yet amusing moment with this family around me. Not noting how the enjoyment is slowly dripping from Mariana's face as she stares down at my glowing phone.

_**"Hey where are you? Xoxo Lou"**_

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><p>Thought I'd leave a cliffhanger for you guys. Next chapter Mariana and Allison talk and who knows maybe Mariana will question her a little further about the events of her day. Especially after seeing that text message. As for Callie anyone think she will narc? Until next time….<p> 


	6. Choices

Sorry for the late update guys. Been working like crazy and writing papers. I'll have tons more for you guys soon. Thanks for the love though, its appreciated as always.

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><p>"Lying doesn't look good on you Allison." Callie scolds me as she hands me a plate to dry off before grabbing a brillo pad to scrub a grease, stained pot.<p>

Callie had ignored me throughout the rest of dinner and while the rest of the family had gone to watch a movie Callie volunteered to clean up. Taking that as my cue to talk to her privately I offered to help which warranted me an eye squint and nod.

Sighing involuntarily I peek at the doorway looking for patrolling ears. "I know Cal and I'm sorry. But your boyfriend kind of put me on the spot and I was enjoying my dinner. So excuse me for not wanting it all over my lap, after Marianna found out I'd played hooky today." Sitting the towel down I take the brillo pad from Callie and attempted to remove the hardened food and grease myself. I knew she was upset by the way she was attacking said pot.

Moving away from me Callie crosses her arms over her chest staring at me with anger flooding her cheeks. WWIII had officially started. "You can't do that. You can't lie and expect me to just sit there like I have no idea what's going on. This was not Wyatt's fault and you know it."

Alright so I'd struck a chord, blaming Wyatt was a low blow but I was already in deep shit and frankly I was trying everything to stay above water. If Callie decided to go off the handle and let Mari know I'd been lying about my whereabouts I'd be dead.

"You are hiding something. I thought it was a figment of my imagination before; that maybe you were just tired. But something else is going on. If it weren't you wouldn't be lying about little things like working when you aren't." Callie brow furrows more than I thought possible as she snatches the brillo pad away from me demanding my attention. Her eyes soften when she sees me visibly flinch. "What's going on Allison? I promise I will try to understand but you have to give me something. It just doesn't add up."

Wiping my hands on my jeans I grab her hand tugging her through the back door to the yard. There was no way I was having this conversation so close to Mariana. I didn't want anyone accidentally hearing my confession I knew was coming.

I start pacing back and forth, mentally arguing with myself if I should tell her. I mean what's the worst that could happen? Callie couldn't be any angrier then she already was. Sure, Lou had only crashed at my place for a few nights on occasion, nothing concrete. But knowing Callie she'd sense there was more than a friend helping a friend in a rough situation. Callie is a lot like me in her sense to smell bullshit. Which I'm sure was reeking from my pacing form. Callie's face was unreadable, meaning she was in full defensive mode and if I didn't start talking soon I would have wished I had. God my Bestie could be intimidating!

I walk over to the nice floral bench that wrapped around the porch, patting it silently for Callie to join me. Reluctantly she does.

"Do you remember Lou? The girl Brandon is supposed to be going on a date with Friday?" Callie doesn't answer just nods her head in understanding.

"We have a history, a very long and complicated one." The laces on my shoes seem to interest me far more then this conversation.

Callie's staring out into the night sky and her face seems too gone into a contemplative state. "So you're cheating on Mariana….with an ex?"

My body stiffens and it takes everything in me not to recoil at her words. "You think I'd cheat on your sister?" My voice cracks a bit as I try to hide the hurt in my voice. "Don't answer that." I gaze up at the sky counting stars while I barricade my crippled feelings. "No, I'm not cheating on Mariana but Lou has been staying with me on and off for months. It's kind of a thing we do. She gets kicked out or something and I'm always there to save the day."

I can feel Callie's eyes on me but I won't look at her. I won't let her see how much this is affecting me when it shouldn't be. "I don't understand; you're ex crashes at your place once in awhile when she gets into some trouble. What does that have to do with you lying to Mariana? Or your change in behavior the past two days….."

"Callie…" My tone is aggravated now and I'm seconds from having a full fledge meltdown. "I'm not lying to Mari. Lou staying over isn't a regular thing and it's more complicated than that."

"Hmm Let me see your lying, skipping work, whenever Zac's name gets mentioned you turn into this overbearing immature two year old. You're hounding Mariana like she's fresh from rehab…. Where are you going? Are you with Zac? How long will you two be gone? It's frustrating and childish and now you're telling me you've had an ex staying with you for the past two days who happens to make this a reoccurring thing "occasionally". Maybe I'm not getting something here; you've had exes before quite a few if I remember correctly. Granted none of them have lived with you that I know of. So what's the deal with her Allison? And why haven't you told Mariana about her? I'm sure she's heard more about this girl from Brandon then you. So really what's going on, if you're not cheating on my sister?" Callie's eyes are pleading with me to help her understand.

The struggle is starting to tug on my self-control; I should be able to talk to her. Here was my best friend, my person I should've been able to tell her everything. Maybe it wasn't the fact about me not telling her. Maybe by telling her I knew I'd be admitting to something I'd tried so hard to ignore. I was happy now, I had my life together or well on its way and someone who loved me through and through. So why was I sabotaging it? I knew the real reason but was I ready to voice it?

"Your right okay and I'm sorting through it. It's just…Zac he's always there and with work and school and everything else I know it's hard on Mariana. I don't want to add extra baggage or stress or whatever this is…..I want to tell Mari about everything, but you and I both know how things will play out. I mean do you think she'll be ok with the fact that Lou is living with me? Especially after I tell her everything including our history."

I involuntarily shudder, the night air running through my thin short sleeve shirt.

"You want to tell me about your history? What is it about her that's causing you to act like this?" Callie refuses to look at me but I can hear the aggravation in her voice.

Standing I walk over to the porch railing, perching myself on the edge as I stare out in to the dark night.

"Lou and I grew up together. At one point and time she was the only person in my life who I trusted and could depend on. She was there for me when my mother died, when I found out about my father cheating on my mom. She's been there for everything Callie. Even though our relationship had been unstable I cared deeply for her and let's just say she was a lot of firsts for me. I wasn't lying when I said we had history Cal, and it's been a repeating cycle for years. I don't know how to explain it but there's always been this pull between us no matter how far apart we are from each other we always find a way back into the each other's life. We haven't been together in over a year and I know I love Mariana but….." I can't bring myself to say it so I just leave the words floating in the air, if anyone could understand it'd be Callie.

Callie gets up and leans on the railing facing the house. Her arms are still crossed but her posture has relaxed more and I can feel her concern circling around me. "So she's been staying with you? Is that safe?"

"I would never do that to Mari. You know how I feel about cheating Cal. How my father doing that to my mom affected me. But I could never abandon Lou, no matter what relationship I'm in. She's never done it to me, even at my worst. It's just so hard to establish that friendship with her after being so much more for years. And I feel if I tell Mariana this she'll expect me to cut her off, or worse break up with me because she thinks I'll eventually go back to Lou." I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket but I ignore it already knowing who it is.

"Would you? I mean do you still have feelings for her? I know you said you'd never cheat on Mari but look at the situation Al. Your ex who you've dated on and off for years and may or may not have residual feelings for, is living with you. If that doesn't scream problem…."

I finally look at Callie and all I see is sympathy. She sure knew how to ask the hard questions and I owed it to myself to figure things out before I ended up losing everything.

"I'll always have feelings for her, something like that just doesn't disappear into thin air Cal. Yet Lou and I were miserable together; she flirted nonstop but had a jealous strike a mile long. She always accused me of being just like my father and in turn would cheat because she thought I was, we fought constantly about petty things. We never communicated; we would hide things from each other or ignore them. There was something's so unhealthy about our relationship; but I loved her and I believe she felt the same. Yet when things were good they were amazing. She could be so attentive, so thoughtful, so patient. I have flaws Cal. I know I'm not perfect and she dealt with them. I've hurt her just as much as she's hurt me, so I can't blame everything on her….."

Callie just stares at me, her eyes speaking volumes motioning for me to continue.

"With Mari everything so different and I'm not used to the stability she gives me. I can't see myself being apart from her either, but I said the same thing about Lou." My small chuckle lacked humor behind it.

Callie rubbed my arms trying to provide some type of comfort. I hadn't realized the tears trekking down my face. "You've managed to really stick you foot in it huh?"

My laugh was genuine. "I'm so confused Cal. I want Mariana more than anything. But I can't help but notice how much Lou as changed. She's not the same girl I knew a year ago, hell even two years ago."

"It's been two days Allison. How would you know?" I face Callie who's peering into the house as Jude runs through the hall carrying something and trying desperately and unsuccessfully to escape Jesus.

"She convinced me to talk it out with Mariana today for one. She could have been conniving; told Brandon about how she really knows me but she hasn't. She's been nothing but encouraging about our relationship even though I know how unhappy she is about it. She wants me happy Cal even if it's not with her; that alone shows me how much she's changed." I want to go inside and grab my jacket but I'm afraid I'll bump into Mari and I'm not ready for that. I'm surprised she hasn't come searching for me or Callie, but I send silent prayers because I can't face her now. Not after I've been crying and you can read every emotion on my face.

Sighing Callie finally turns to me. "You need to figure out what you want Al. It's clear you're not over Lou no matter what you're telling yourself. I hope that you had no intentions of keeping this a secret from Mari, I won't say anything. But I can't sit here and act like I can accept it either. I think you should steer clear for a while. Talk to Mariana tonight, you don't have to tell her about Lou right now. Just don't string her along, I won't allow it. I love you like a sister, but Mariana is my sister and I won't let your inability to decide hurt her. I can't."

"What do I tell her Callie? I don't want to hurt her? I couldn't live with myself if I did, and me ending things will definitely hurt her. But I can't tell her the truth, I'm not ready Cal." My phone vibrates again for the umpteenth time tonight and I know Lou won't stop until I answer. I'm also positive Lou will be waiting for me when I get home.

"I don't care what you tell her. Tell her you need time; that work, school, and everything else is too much and you need time to get yourself in order. Tell her that this doesn't affect how you feel, just everything is too much for you right now."

Callie completely ignores my look of shock and disdain targeted her way. "So basically tell her I don't have time for her. That our relationship has become a burden and time consuming? Callie really?"

"Well its better then the latter. Don't you think?" Callie squares her shoulders as she lifts an acute eyebrow towards me.

"Look either way Mari will be hurt in the end. Wouldn't you rather it be because of this instead of later down the road when you realize that you're still in love with Lou? I'm sure Mari could forgive you eventually, but not for that. Not with what she's gone through just to be with you; not when she's given so much to you. This is the right thing to do Allison. We both know it."

With this Callie walks away leaving me conflicted and guilt written on the back porch. Callie is right, this was my only option if I wanted to sort through my feelings for Mari and Lou. I didn't want to hurt Mariana but I couldn't help but think there was something worth salvaging there with Lou. Callie knew this; she could read me better than almost anyone. She is giving me an out, allotting options that I wouldn't even grant myself. Callie is trying to help me without compromising her relationship with her sister; trying to put everyone's feelings into consideration. She knew I wouldn't come to this conclusion on my own, not with Mari as my girlfriend. And as much as I liked to think I wouldn't, she was saving me from possibly damaging my relationship before it was too late.

Finally looking at my phone I sighed heavily noting the 11 missed calls and 23 texts messages from Lou. After listening to the last two slightly slurred voicemails I knew I'd have to prepare myself for an infuriated and drunk Lou. I knew I couldn't allow Lou to stay with me anymore. I'd have to work out something. It wouldn't be fair to Mariana or me when I was trying to figure things out. I had to even the playing field as much as possible meaning if I had to stay away from Mari the same rule applied for Lou.

Running my fingers roughly through my hair I pull up my contact for Mariana on my cell. A picture we'd taken a few weeks ago at a random carnival appeared. I'd just won the ugliest purple and blue dungeon dragon stuff animal and Mari was clutching it like I'd just given her my most prized possession. Her eyes were bright and filled with happiness while peering down at the toy but mines were glued to her, love and adoration spilling from my face. Callie argued how sappy we were being, claiming her blood sugar was sky rocketing from all the sweet and happy coming from us. But she'd taken this picture.

My heart skips a beat just remembering the day and I knew I owed it to Mariana to figure this out. I refused to hurt her; she'd already proved how much she was in this with me. I pulled up the text icon. Typing in the three most dreaded words anyone can say in a relationship.

"Can we talk?"

It took Mariana less than a minute to respond to me. I figured she'd noticed when Callie walked in and I remained outside. She had probably noticed how quiet I'd been a dinner and wanted to give me time to sort through whatever was bothering me before she came to see if I was okay. Mariana was perfect in that sense, always giving me time to sort out my problems.

My phone lights up again indicating a response.

"Everything ok? Where are you?"

"Back porch. We'll talk."

As soon as I sent it I knew Mariana would go into immediate concern. So I walked over to the bench bracing myself for a conversation I had a feeling would leave me heartbroken and possibly the one person who'd never given me a reason to.


	7. Hard To Walk Away

I've never been one to long, or depend on anyone. Even though Lou had deemed the only permanent in my life throughout childhood until now; I had never cling to her in any desperate need. I'd always strolled through life with the indication that people come and go; that nothing was substantial or deep-seated to anyone. People were made to endure whether it be happiness, love, or death. You really had no control over who you allowed in your life, how they impacted you, and how long they stayed. So I figure why indulge in ambitious thinking. I weighed this largely on the fact that people were unpredictable. That emotions were completely transmutable and no one was immune to this.

I witnessed first hand how my father's infidelity changed my mom's overall outlook; how she felt about her fictitiously perfect family; pain, despondency, and grief marked her face everyday. Until we discovered her cancer and all those emotions were replaced and finalized with despair. My mother spent the last four years of her life in complete and utter misery. My dad hadn't always been like this with my mom; in fact I used to cling desperately to memory's were words were not questioned and love surrounded our small family to no end. Along the line something changed; and I had front row seats to the most life altering cinema to impact my precious and very susceptible mind.

Still don't believe me? Here's some first hand concrete depositions.

I discovered my strong disinterest of boys and their man junk in 7th grade when Aaron Mullen's tried to feel me up during a not so private game of "seven minutes in heaven". It wasn't that he wasn't cute or anything, he was the most popular boy in our grade and had a set of abs that would put grown man who frequented the gym regularly to shame. I'd never been bothered before by physical touching. In fact I'd been perfectly fine with kissing Aaron, it hadn't been entirely repulsing and his lips were surprisingly really soft. But when I felt is slightly rough hands itching under my shirt to my bare back, I couldn't rid the feeling of disgust. My skin started to crawl with a sense of uneasiness of this innocent adolescent game; so when he tried to unclasp my bra in what looked to be the filthiest janitor's closet ever, I lost it. All I remember is my P.E. couch yanking me by the forearm off of a bloody wailing Aaron. In all honesty I'd only played because Lou had, and I'd hoped beyond all hope that my spin would land on her.

When one Ethan Miller arrived to pick me up from school, I'd had no qualms about relinquishing the story to him. If anyone would understand it would be daddy…right? He'd definitely side with his little girl and assuage all the questions she had about what was happening to her and why. That was the fatherly thing to do right? My father had tore me a new hind that day; something about how I had better not compromised his chances at partner since Aaron's dad was great friends with his boss. I only halved listened seeing as even at the tender age of twelve I figured my father was full of shit.

You can't blame me for this conclusion I've come to; though my hypothesis may be biased. All my life I've experienced the effects of change; whether that be emotionally, physically, of psychology.

The night air drops and I have half the mind to text Mariana and ask her to bring my jacket along with her ass. I've been out here for nearly twenty minutes and left to perish in my thoughts. Thoughts that I shouldn't even entertain right now in this moment. I needed a clear head to talk to Mariana and right now thinking of my misgivings were not the way to go.

Finally the back door opens and my thoughts are interrupted. Looking around the yard nervously Mariana thrusts out a hand carrying a sweater. Her favorite sweater. Leave it to her to be sentimental when I'm about to be the biggest ass in the history of derriere's.

"Callie told me it was cold out I thought you'd like this."

Without eye contact I take the sweater and hastily through it over my head and through my arms. "Thank you." My voice is barely above a whisper and my palms feel clammy from nerves.

"I don't entirely know how to start this Mari. There is no right way, and I need you to understand that this does not reflect on you. Yo- your perfect…."

My eyes link with Mariana and I feel myself slowly losing nerve. What was I doing? The girl of my dreams was literally standing in front of me with so much confusion, dread, and hope in her eyes. Did I really want to do this? Was losing this miraculously beautiful person in front of me worth it? Was Lou worth it?

Ducking her head I could hear the hurt in Mariana's voice before it reached me. "Your breaking up with me aren't you?"

I'm frozen into silence and all I can do at this point is stare at her and wish for her not to question me. Hope that she doesn't think it's because of her. Pray that she doesn't hate me. I stand there gazing at her for what felt like seconds but were minutes.

"Is that it? This isn't working for you? Allison?" Squinting her eyes in frustration of my silence she stalks past me to the yard.

Without words I follow, my mind a busy contradiction to my mouth as my inner thoughts scream to be spoken.

"If you have nothing to say then don't follow me?" Mariana is perched defensively against the tree with the century old tire swing attached to it.

"This isn't something I want to do Mariana. I need to fig-"

"Stop!"

I cut my eyes away from the ground at the sudden intensity and aggravation present in Mariana's voice.

"Don't lie to me. You haven't yet so please don't. Try the truth." Her brows are furrowed and the night air allowed stray strands of golden locks to frame her features. Even upset she was undeniably breathe taking.

"I don't want to hurt you. It's as simple as that. I'm so confused Mariana. I want you, to be with you. But there's something that's stopping that. I'm sorry. I just need time to figure this out. I want to make sure this is the right decision for both of us. All I'm asking for is time."

Pursing my lips together I feel my face flushing from anticipation of her response. The wind has picked up slightly causing the hairs on the back of my neck to tap against my spine. Goosebumps eluding down my back.

"It's just a break right?" Mariana has moved over to the age old swing sitting down and swaying slightly in sync with the wind.

Grabbing the rope and shifting slightly so I can give her a good push, my senses are immediately invaded with Mariana's scent. Knots form in my stomach and once again I start to question whether this is the right decision.

The incessant vibration of my phone in my pocket is what halts my train of thought. This was the right thing to do. I couldn't forgive myself if I messed up, if I hurt Mariana.

Catching the rope mid swing I turn Mariana to face me. I really needed her to hear me, being vague was not an option.

"This is a break Mariana. I'm sorry, but it's the right thing to do."

If I had any control over my actions I would've stepped away, but being this close to Mariana stopped all mental function. Cradling her face I run my thumb down her jaw line to her lips. Stepping closer I place a light kiss on her lips, trying to convey exactly how I felt about the ridiculously beautiful Latina in front of me.

Gathering the last bit of my resolve I do the only thing I can do and walk away. I needed to get my emotions together before I dealt with the shipwreck waiting for me at home.


End file.
